4am Fanfiction
by Miake Yuy
Summary: My insane fanfiction written at 4am. PLEASE R+R.
1. Default Chapter

Miake: Finally I'm getting this started. I've gone through many pages of fanfiction written at the insane hour of 4:00am to bring you the craziest project I have ever commited myself to. Introducing: 4:00am Fanfiction!!!  
  
Basically each chapter is a different story written by me at 4:00am. Why do I write fanfiction at 4:00am you ask? The answer would be because I'm am an insomniac and I like to write so I combined these two favorite things of mine and have created 4:00am Fanfiction. Do enjoy the insanity, randomness and pure weirdness of these tales.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own YGO don't sue me.  
  
******************  
  
Part One: The Sherlock Holmes Experiment  
  
Kaiba: *dressed as Sherlock Holmes* Have you the time dear brother Mokuba.  
  
Mokuba: *dressed as Watson* Yes, the clock has just struck the hour of four.  
  
Kaiba: I do believe that we must investigate the murder of poor Yugi Moto.  
  
Mokuba: But we haven't any clues. Where are we off to?  
  
Kaiba: *puffs pipe*  
  
Yugi: *dressed as himself* You really shouldn't smoke. It causes lung cancer.  
  
Mokuba: BEFORE ME! ARE MY EYES PLAYING TRICKS ON ME?  
  
Kaiba: It is the ghost of Yugi Moto.  
  
Yugi: I'VE COME FOR YOUR LIVES! *takes out a sword*  
  
*Kaiba wakes up*  
  
Kaiba: That was a weird dream. No more reading before I go to bed.  
  
Mokuba: *only half awake* Who are you talking to Seto?  
  
Kaiba: Myself.  
  
Mokuba: Did you have a bad dream?  
  
Kaiba: No, it was just reall weird.  
  
Mokuba: What happened?  
  
Kaiba: I was dressed as Sherlock Holmes and you were Watson and Yugi came back from the dead and--  
  
Mokuba: Yugi's not dead.  
  
Yugi: *wakes up hearing his name* Huh? What about me?  
  
Mokuba: Kaiba thought you were dead.  
  
Kaiba: NO! In my dream you came back from the dead.  
  
Yugi: Why was I dead?  
  
Kaiba: I woke up before I could find out how it happened.  
  
Miake: *who never sleeps* OMIGOD! I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS!!! I once had this dream where I was being attacked by this masked figure and he was trying to shoot me and before I could find out who it was I woke up and I REALLY wanted to know who it was and--  
  
Kaiba: *clamps Miake's mouth closed*  
  
Yami Bakura: *comes out of the Millenium Ring* Thank you! I thought she'd never shut up.  
  
Mai: What are you all going on about? I'm trying to get my beauty sleep.  
  
Kaiba: I had a weird dream.  
  
Mai: That's great but it really shouldn't have to effect ME!  
  
Miake: *tries to talk but can't*  
  
Tea: *wakes up* I had a weird dream. It was scary. Me and Yugi and Tristan and Joey all got into a huge FIGHT!  
  
Kaiba: That sounds more funny than sad.  
  
Tea: Question: Why are you not letting Miake talk?  
  
Kaiba: If I release her she will never shut up for all eternity.  
  
Miake: *agrees silently*  
  
Bakura: She probably doesn't mind.  
  
Tea: Why?  
  
Bakura: Because she likes Kaiba.  
  
Miake: *agrees silently*  
  
Kaiba: Ok, on another topic, does anyone know what's on TV at 4:00am?  
  
Yugi: I have no idea.  
  
Mai: It's not appropriate for young eyes like Yugi and Bakura.  
  
Bakura: Since when do you care about me?  
  
Mai: I just don't want you getting too excited.  
  
Mokuba: *fell asleep*  
  
Joey: YOU PEOPLE NEED TO SHUT UP! I CAN'T SLEEP!  
  
Kaiba: Shut up dog boy.  
  
Miake: *really wants to talk*  
  
Tristan: Yeah, why isn't anyone sleeping.  
  
Kaiba: I had a weird dream.  
  
Tristan: And we care WHY?  
  
Kaiba: Because I said so. I'm going to go on the computer.  
  
Miake: HAHAHA! I CAN TALK I CAN TALK I CAN TALK. heheheh!  
  
Kaiba: Darnit!  
  
Miake: See when I go for long periods of time without talking it's bad because then I go on and on and on and on and--  
  
Joey: SHUT UP!  
  
Miake: and did you know about the time when  
  
Bakura: SHUT UP!  
  
Miake: Did I tell you about--  
  
Yugi: SHUT UP!  
  
Miake: IT WAS SO FUNNY AND--  
  
Kaiba: SHUT UP!  
  
Miake: *sits silently*  
  
Kaiba: I have power.  
  
Yugi: How did you do that?  
  
Kaiba: I have power.  
  
Bakura: I'm tired.  
  
Miake: Yeah, sorry for keeping everyone up. But it's 4:00am Fanfiction. This is going to happen every night.  
  
Mai: You mean I'm never going to get any sleep.  
  
Miake: I could give you a night off once in a while.  
  
Mai: LIKE NOW! *goes to sleep*  
  
Kaiba: I think we should all lock Miake in a closet.  
  
Miake: AHHH! NOOOOOOO!  
  
Kaiba: I like that idea.  
  
Yugi: Me too.  
  
Tristan: Sure, I'll do it.  
  
*everyone chases after Miake*  
  
Miake: No, I really don't think this is a good idea. Please! Don't AHHHHHHHHHH!  
  
*Miake gets locked in a closet*  
  
Kaiba: Finally, peace and quiet  
  
Miake: Until the next time. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
  
*everyone goes to sleep and the world is safe*  
  
*********  
  
So, what did everyone think of that? Please review. I'll be posting more of these if people like them. 


	2. The Caffinated Kaiba Experiment

Miake: What up all. This is just a note to all, each chapter is unrelated to the last unless it says so. These were all written at 4:00am that's about all that relates to the others. So let us begin once again with the insanity shall we.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own YGO...sadly I also don't own Kaiba ^_^  
  
************  
  
The Caffinated Kaiba Experiment  
  
Miake: Ya know, I wonder what it would be like if Kaiba was on a sugar high.  
  
Joey: That sounds really scary.  
  
Tea: It's not nice to get people high on sugar.  
  
Miake: Who said anything about being "nice" *laughs evilly*  
  
Tristan: Whoa, she's scary.  
  
Yugi: No, she just had too much candy.  
  
Kaiba: You will never be able to caffinate me.  
  
Yami Bakura: Ah, but she can.  
  
Kaiba: What do you know?  
  
Yami Bakura: A lot more than you. I've been around longer.  
  
Kaiba: Do you REALLY think you could get me high on sugar? I have self control so even if you give me sugar I'll never be hyper.  
  
Miake: Really now? So eat these and let's see. *hands Kaiba tons of candy*  
  
Half an hour later.......  
  
Kaiba: Must---resist-----hyperness.  
  
Miake: Hard isn't it?  
  
Kaiba: Yes.  
  
Yugi: I think he's going to break.  
  
Joey: *takes out video camera*  
  
Kaiba: HYYYYYYYYYYPPPPPPEEEERRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Miake: Whoa.  
  
Kaiba: Guess what? I dunno! But I'm hyper. Is this what it's like to be Miake. Constantly hyper, hyper is fun, me like hyper, want mooooooore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Mokuba: What did you do to him?  
  
Miake: That was a really bad idea.  
  
Mokuba: YOU CAFFINATED HIM!  
  
Kaiba: CAAAAAAFFFFFFFIIIIINNNNEEEEEE!  
  
Miake: I'm dead.  
  
*everyone restrains Kaiba from going to the kitchen to get more chocolate*  
  
Kaiba: I'm gonna go jump off the roof. COMIN' WITH ME?  
  
Yugi: Um, probably not.  
  
Kaiba: Hehe, you're no fun.  
  
Miake: I've gotta do something.  
  
Mokuba: DUH!  
  
Miake: What do I do?  
  
Mokuba: Pour ice water on him.  
  
Miake: Will it work?  
  
Mokuba: It worked last time I caffinated him.  
  
Miake: You caffinated him too?  
  
Mokuba: Yeah.  
  
Miake: That's funny.  
  
Joey: No it's not. It's scary.  
  
Kaiba: LOOK, IT'S THE DOGGIE BOY!  
  
Joey: Alright, that's it, GET ME THE ICE WATER!  
  
Miake: Here *hands Joey bucket of ice water*  
  
Joey: *pours it on Kaiba*  
  
Kaiba: *looks like he just woke up from a trance* What just happened?  
  
Mokuba: Miake caffinated you.  
  
Miake: Sorry 'bout that.  
  
Kaiba: I'm all wet.  
  
Joey: I poured ice water down your back.  
  
Kaiba: Then somebody get me a towel.  
  
*everyone looks at each other*  
  
Kaiba: Miake, get me a towel.  
  
Miake: Ok.  
  
Bakura: It's really scary that she listens to him.  
  
Kaiba: It's good.  
  
Miake: Here *hands Kaiba a towel*.  
  
Kaiba: My clothes are all wet.  
  
Joey: I think I'm going to run now.  
  
Kaiba: That would be a good idea if you want to live.  
  
Joey: *Runs*  
  
Kaiba: I'm going to change then kill the dog boy.  
  
Miake: Are you mad at me for caffinating you?  
  
Kaiba: Yes.  
  
Miake: Sorry Seto *gives Kaiba puppy dog eyes*  
  
Kaiba: You need a life.  
  
Miake: Ya know, lots of people tell me that.  
  
Kaiba: Then lots of people are smart *changes and comes back to find Joey*  
  
Joey: He'll never find me in here.  
  
Kaiba: *open the refridgerator*  
  
Joey: Hey, how did you find me?  
  
Kaiba: I figured you'd be somewhere with food.  
  
Joey: Am I really THAT predictable?  
  
Kaiba: Yes.  
  
Joey: How come you're not hurting me?  
  
Kaiba: Because I'm too tired. But someday I'll get my revenge.  
  
Miake: Ohhhhh, sounds scary.  
  
Kaiba: *rolls eyes* Somebody lock her in a padded room with a straight jacket.  
  
*************  
  
Please review! Thanx 


	3. The Shakespeare Experiment

Miake: More 4am insanity...  
  
Kaiba: It's creepy.  
  
Miake: I know.  
  
Kaiba: No one just gets up at 4:00am for fun.  
  
Miake: But I do.  
  
Kaiba: *sigh* I'll just do the disclaimer now...Miake doesn't own Yu-Gi-Oh, she doesn't own 4:00am. I'm tired and I'm going to sleep.  
  
Miake: I'm hyper.  
  
Kaiba: Go figure.  
  
***********  
  
The Shakespeare Experiment  
  
Miake: I hath decided to speak in old English ere now.  
  
Kaiba: Why?  
  
Miake: In school we are doth learning the tragedy of Romeo and Juliet so I hath decid'th to speak in their style of language.  
  
Joey: That's just scary.  
  
Yami: I myself am I fan of the great Shakespeare.  
  
Miake: Are you now?  
  
Yami: Had thou read'st Macbeth?  
  
Miake: It is thy favorite.  
  
Joey: *wakes up* What are you people talking about?  
  
Yami: Good morrow to you lad.  
  
Joey: WHAT THE HECK?  
  
Miake: Is't thou appaled at our new speaking pattern?  
  
Joey: Duh.  
  
Yugi: It IS kind of weird.  
  
Kaiba: I was never much of a Shakespeare fan.  
  
Miake: Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo, deny thy father and refuse thy name and I'll no longer be a Capulet!  
  
Kaiba: Great, now she's trying to memorize it.  
  
Yami: Good Miake, thou has't scare'd him.  
  
Miake: Really, hads't I?  
  
Joey: CAN YOU QUIT TALKING LIKE THAT?  
  
Yami: I find it to be most enjoyable.  
  
Miake: I doth agree with dear Yami.  
  
Yami Bakura: This is annoying.  
  
Yami: Do pardon us young lad.  
  
Yami Bakura: I've been around just as long as you!  
  
Kaiba: He makes a good point.  
  
Miake: Fine, I shall go hither to thy room and sleep for the morn brings exams and I must rest.  
  
Joey: FINALLY!  
  
Yami: I shall follow and rest as well.  
  
Joey: FINALLY!  
  
Kaiba: I was ready to hurt them.  
  
Yami Bakura: Weren't we all.  
  
**********  
  
Miake: And that is yet another testimony of insanity of 4am Fanfiction 


	4. The Christmas Wrapping Experiment

Miake: I love 4:00am. It's the greatest time.  
  
Kaiba: It is NOT the greatest time.  
  
Miake: Yes it is.  
  
Kaiba: I personally don't think so.  
  
Miake: I bet the disclaimer thinks so.  
  
Kaiba: Um, right. Miake doesn't own YGO.  
  
Miake: Good job.  
  
***********  
  
The Christmas Wrapping Experiment  
  
Miake: DAH! I DIDN'T WRAP MY CHRISTMAS PRESENTS!  
  
*upon that, everyone woke up*  
  
Kaiba: And we're supposed to care WHY?  
  
Miake: I need help!  
  
Joey: Are they presents for us?  
  
Miake: I already wrapped those.  
  
Tristan: You got us presents?  
  
Miake: Of course I did.  
  
Yugi: Awww. Who are these presents for?  
  
Miake: Parents, brother, friends at school.  
  
Yami: Cool.  
  
Kaiba: If we help you wrap presents, will you go to sleep?  
  
Miake: Yes.  
  
Bakura: FUN!  
  
Yami Bakura: That was creepy.  
  
Tea: Not as creepy as you.  
  
Yami Bakura: I'll kill you.  
  
Miake: Tea, don't diss Yami Bakura.  
  
Tea: Why?  
  
Miake: BECAUSE! It's just not cool.  
  
Tea: I think it is cool.  
  
Kaiba: That's why it's not cool.  
  
Mokuba: Go bro!  
  
Kaiba: Don't call me bro.  
  
Joey: Hey, let's wrap Yugi in wrapping paper.  
  
Yugi: Why me?  
  
Joey: You're small enough to fit.  
  
Yugi: What about Mokuba?  
  
Mokuba: *hides behind Kaiba*  
  
Kaiba: You are NOT wrapping my brother in wrapping paper.  
  
Miake: Wrap me in wrapping paper and give me as a present to Kaiba.  
  
Kaiba: Can I re-gift?  
  
Miake: THAT'S SO MEAN! *goes off in a corner*  
  
Yugi: That wasn't nice.  
  
Joey: Yeah, I mean, she's annoying and insane and hyper and random and wears her hair in a ponytail all day everyday and stuff but that wasn't right!  
  
Tristan: Yeah man.  
  
Mokuba: Are you ok Miake?  
  
Miake: I will be after I wrap all these presents. And after Kaiba apologizes to me.  
  
Mokuba: Apologize to her.  
  
Kaiba: *silent*  
  
Mokuba: It might take him a while.  
  
Miake: Just as it might take me a while to wrap these presents.  
  
Joey: Look, it's Yugi!  
  
Yugi: *covered in wrapping paper* I CAN'T BREATHE!  
  
Tristan: That might be a problem.  
  
Yugi: *tears all the paper off of him* That was fun...I think.  
  
*2 hours later*  
  
Miake: IT'S DONE, ALL DONE! I'M HAPPY ONCE AGAIN!  
  
Kaiba: Even without me apologizing?  
  
Miake: Maybe.  
  
Kaiba: Um, uh, I um, I guess I'm sorry.  
  
Miake: Cool. Now wasn't that easy.  
  
Kaiba: *half smiles*  
  
Miake: *smiles*  
  
And life was good again.  
  
*************  
  
Please review. thanx 


	5. The Kaiba Gets Bored Experiment

Miake: Well I took a loooooooong break from writing fanfiction but now I'm back.  
  
Kaiba: Darn it.  
  
Miake: And Kaiba still hates me. Nothing has changed.  
  
Kaiba: So maybe you'll take the hint and leave me alone.  
  
Miake: But takes all the fun out of it. Anyway, I don't own YGO. I wish I did but I'm just not lucky like that.  
  
*********  
  
The Kaiba Gets Bored Experiment  
  
Kaiba: I'm bored.  
  
Miake: No kidding, that's why this is called the "Kaiba Gets Bored" Experiment not the "Kaiba has a lot to do and is overloaded with work and isn't bored experiment"  
  
Kaiba: But I do have a lot to do and I AM overloaded with work.  
  
Miake: But that doesn't make a good story. "Kaiba worked for 15 hours straight. The end" That's really stupid.  
  
Kaiba: Neither is "Kaiba sits and does nothing for 15 hours straight". I'm writing this fanfiction.  
  
Miake: NO WAIT I-------  
  
Kaiba: From now on I'M writing this story because I'm bored and I don't want Miake writing anymore stupid stories.  
  
Joey: Now we're doomed. Kaiba's going to turn me into a dog, just watch.  
  
Kaiba: First of all, Joey becomes a dog and becomes road kill. *Joey becomes a dog*  
  
*Joey fans give Kaiba an evil look*  
  
Kaiba: Fine, Joey becomes a dog and doesn't become road kill. But it would be funny. Then Yugi gives me his Millenium Puzzle. *Yugi randomly hands Kaiba his Millienum Puzzle*  
  
Yugi: HEY! I don't think I like this story.  
  
Miake: There's nothing I can do about it, he stole my pen.  
  
Yugi: And you don't have another?  
  
Miake: It's under my bed.  
  
Yugi: Figures.  
  
Kaiba: SHUT UP! I can't write with you people talking. Ok, then I become the ruler of the world. *becomes the ruler of the world*  
  
Tristan: Hey Kaiba, no offense but your story has no plot.  
  
Kaiba: Shut up or I'll turn you into a dog just like your friend Joey. I think I like fanfiction writing. It gives you power!  
  
Miake: Why do you think I do it?  
  
Kaiba: That's right, Miake has to be in this story.  
  
Miake: Really? *gets starry eyed*  
  
Kaiba: Miake gets larengytis (don't know how to spell that) and she can't talk. *Miake can't talk*  
  
Tea: Hey, that's not fair! You can't control our lives!  
  
Kaiba: And yet I can.  
  
Tea: It's not nice, real friends----  
  
Kaiba: And Tea never gives another friendship speech again.  
  
Tea: *shuts up*  
  
Bakura: I don't like this. We have to get the pen back from Kaiba.  
  
Yami Bakura: Isn't it great watching people in pain.  
  
Malik: Yes indeed.  
  
Bakura: Why did I have to get stuck with the psycho Yami.  
  
Pegasus: And you think YOU have problems? I had an eye with a funky eye on it for half my life!  
  
Bakura: It's called the Millenium Eye.  
  
Kaiba: SHUT UP ALL OF YOU! Or I'll make you all my personal slaves.  
  
Bakura: I think we should take his advice.  
  
Yami: *now posessing Kaiba since Kaiba has the puzzle* I'll take control of this story. *starts writing* Everything goes back to the way it was before Kaiba started writing and the pen runs out of ink.  
  
*everything goes back to normal*  
  
Kaiba: I hate you Yami.  
  
Yami: Thank you. I'm sorry but I could not let the world fall into the hands of Seto Kaiba.  
  
Kaiba: You make it sound like it's a bad thing.  
  
Bakura: IT IS!  
  
Joey: What he said.  
  
Miake: Ok, 4am fanfiction has reached a new level of insanity.  
  
Yami Bakura: How about you have a poll to see who people think should write the next fanfiction?  
  
Miake: Ok.  
  
Vote for who should take over the story next chapter! Please review 


	6. The Winner is

Miake: Arg, I haven't written fanfiction in almost a month. But I think I'll be writing more soon. It's been a hectic month. And it was my birthday January 31st.  
  
Kaiba: This is so irrelivant.  
  
Miake: Fine, be mean to me like that. But the whole point is that I'll be writing more like I used to. Maybe not the 100's if chapters a day but enough.  
  
Kaiba: Ok, no one cares. Let's just do the disclaimer.  
  
Miake: Ok, I don't own YGO or any of the characters. Miake is property of Miake and Kaiba if he so wishes.  
  
Kaiba: I don't.  
  
************  
  
You voted and now the writer of the fanfiction will be...  
  
YAMI BAKURA!!!!  
  
Yami Bakura: Ha ha, now you will all suffer.  
  
Joey: What's wrong with you people. Do you want us all dead?  
  
Tristan: I hate when my life is in the hands of a madman.  
  
Miake: Yea, really ruins your day doesn't it.  
  
Yami Bakura: *takes the pen* I have the power! First of all I'm renaming it the Millenium Pen because of the powers it does posess. First of all, everyone will bow down to me.  
  
*everyone bows down*  
  
Yami Bakura: I am your master! You will now obey me. Seto Kaiba, your company is now BakuraCorp.  
  
Kaiba: Never.  
  
Miake: *whispers to Kaiba* Um, you kind of have to do what he says because it's his fanfiction.  
  
Kaiba: I'm going to kill him.  
  
Miake: I don't think you get it, it's his fanfic, you can't kill him.  
  
Kaiba: *steams silently*  
  
Yami Bakura: And now Yugi will give me the Millenium Puzzle!  
  
Yugi: *hands Yami Bakura the Millenium Puzzle*  
  
Yami Bakura: The world is now ruled by me.  
  
Malik: What about me?  
  
Yami Bakura: There's not enough world for the both of us.  
  
Malik: *takes "Millenium Pen"*  
  
Yami Bakura: NOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Malik: Change that to MalikCorp, Malik's Millenium Puzzle and Malik's world.  
  
Miake: Somehow I think it was safer when they were friends.  
  
Bakura: Oh dear, is my Yami causing problems again.  
  
Kaiba: YES! So if you wouldn't mind, can you sedate him or something.  
  
Bakura: I'm afraid I can't do that.  
  
Kaiba: Well, you're useless.  
  
*Bakura fans get annoyed*  
  
Miake: That's not what he meant, he meant, um, uh--  
  
Kaiba: I meant what I said.  
  
Miake: *sigh*  
  
Yami Bakura: *steals back "Millenium Pen"* Now Everyone is going to shut up and let me write.  
  
Malik: What if I kill you first.  
  
Yami Bakura: Two reasons why you can't do that. 1) It's my fanfic and I don't die in my own stories and 2) I'M A SPIRIT!  
  
Malik: *takes pen*  
  
Miake: MALIK! You can't have the pen, it's Yami Bakura's pen. GIVE HIM BACK THE PEN!  
  
Yami Bakura: MILLENIUM PEN, not just any pen. Thank you. Ok, now, moving on. Malik is sitting in a corner with a dunce cap on for being bad.  
  
Malik: *is sulking*  
  
Yami Bakura: I didn't know writing fanfiction could be so dangerous.  
  
Miake: Yeah, us writers don't get enough credit.  
  
Yami Bakura: Alright, here's what happens. Yugi gives me the Millenium Puzzle and gets a haircut. He also stops drinking coffee because it's obviously stunting is growth.  
  
Yugi: I don't drink coffee.  
  
Miake: SHHHH! This is getting good.  
  
Yami Bakura: Joey walks around wearing a dog suit and eats dog food and basically acts like a dog until he dies. When he does I'll celebrate.  
  
Miake: Why, he never did anything to you?  
  
Yami Bakura: I said so. Now, Tea gets her mouth superglued closed and never gives another friendship speech again.  
  
Tea: *cries*  
  
Yami Bakura: I made her cry, that's always a plus. Ok, moving on. Mokuba gets a braid and looks like Duo Maxwell from Gundam Wing. I find something about that humorous. Tristan randomly gets shot for no appearent reason.  
  
Bakura: Oh my, he's really scaring me.  
  
Miake: Your Yami, your problem.  
  
Yami Bakura: Kaiba looses his briefcase making him temporarily insane. He kills Pegasus and spontaneously combusts.  
  
Bakura: I told him that anger management would be a good thing but he just won't listen.  
  
Yami Bakura: Malik...gets beat up by his sister and screams like a girl making a fool out of himself.  
  
Malik: *would really like to hurt Yami Bakura*  
  
Yami Bakura: Bakura finally shuts up about anger management and stops being so nice. I can't have him killed because he's my host. I hate that.  
  
Bakura: *sigh* I'm safe.  
  
Yami Bakura: And lastly, Miake...she...becomes my minion and takes all my orders.  
  
Miake: Hey, it least I'm not dead.  
  
Yami Bakura: That was fun.  
  
Joey: Yeah...for who?  
  
**********  
  
Alright, I hope everyone liked that. Please review! Thanx 


End file.
